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What If All Our Ex-Candidates Lived in Texas?

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What If All Our Ex-Candidates Lived in Texas?

AP

California Republican Senate candidate Carly Fiorina addresses supporters in Irvine, Calif., Tuesday, Nov. 2, 2010. (AP Photo/Reed Saxon)

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George Strait famously sang that all his ex's lived in Texas, which is why he had to live in Tennessee.

Now that former California state legislator and 2010 U.S. Senate candidate Chuck DeVore has announced he is pulling out of a race for Orange County supervisor to move to Texas, one wonders where California might place other ex-candidates for statewide offices who sought the Golden State's love -- but couldn't make the relationship work.

One has to admire DeVore for leaving, instead of sticking around and playing the California Republican game of blocking the majority's fiscal policies -- and then blaming the majority when things go wrong.

If only other Republicans might be convinced to do the same, since none seem to want to stick around, fight for reform that would give the party a chance of gaining power again, and develop a public platform for governing the state that's responsive to California's needs.

A few suggested destinations for other California ex's, since they can't all live in Texas:

-Meg Whitman: New York City

The Big Apple loves to sell the mayor's job to the highest bidder.

The current occupant of the office, Michael Bloomberg, has bought it three times in campaigns that set spending records -- that were broken by Whitman's failed gubernatorial campaign last year. $150 million-plus of your own money seemed too much to Californians, but that kind of self-financing is par for the course in politics.

-Carly Fiorina: Arizona

California has never elected a woman governor, but Arizona has elected three in a row.

Plus, her social conservatism, which made her unelectable in last year's U.S. Senate race against a vulnerable Barbara Boxer, is a good fit with the Grand Canyon State.

-Tom Campbell. Australia

The moderate politician is an endangered species in America, so people such as Arnold Schwarzenegger, Jon Huntsman Jr. and Campbell should relocate outside the country if they want to win elections.

So why Australia? Answer: remember the demon sheep ad, a bizarre Fiorina attack on Campbell during the 2010 GOP Senate primary?

Well, it turns out that Australia leads the world in production of wool. Plenty of sheep to run amongst down under, Tom.

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