Don't call Tom Brady "Tommy Salami."
The NFL hottie makes that perfectly clear in "Tom Brady's Best Friend," his new video for Funny or Die.
The skit, the second one Brady has done for the comedy website, features a salesman at a sportings good store who convinces the Patriots quarterback to pretend to be his friend so he could impress his girlfriend's parents.
Unfortunately, he crosses the line and claims he and Brady are actually besties. So much so that he has pet names for him, including "Tom Bomb," "Tommy Salami" and "Brady Bunch."
Brady eventually has enough and storms out of the store. "I'm not your friend," he growls.
Brady's first Funny Or Die video took place at the same store with the salesman and customers mocking him for having what they believe is a Boston accent.