Solving world peace is probably easier than snagging a ticket to Hollywood's most exclusive Oscar parties.
Even so, that doesn't mean what happens at these parties stays at these parties.
Sure, everyone knows about the Vanity Fair bash, but it's not the only A-list soiree that takes place over Oscars weekend. Here's your guide!
Talent Agency Parties
CAA boss Bryan Lourd used to open his home on the Friday night before the big show, but this year the festivities are going down at nightclub Greystone Manor (his abode is under renovations, see). William Morris Endeavor and United Talent Agency, however, are still taking place at their bosses' private homes.
VIP Cred: No cameras allowed as the talent agencies' gazillion-dollar clients mix and mingle.
Likely Guests: George Clooney, Charlize Theron, Madonna, Reese Witherspoon, Jessica Chastain, Victoria Beckham, Julia Roberts, Mark Wahlberg, Sofia Vergara, Sacha Baron Cohen, Harrison Ford and Matthew Morrison.
Fun Fact: A few years back, ex-fiances Brad Pitt and Gwyneth Paltrow pulled out their phones at CAA to show each other pics of their kids. Awww.
The Beverly Hills Hotel gala benefits the Motion Picture &Television Fund.
VIP Cred: The host committee is ridiculous. This year's list includes Jennifer Aniston and Justin Theroux, Ben Affleck and Jennifer Garner, Will and Jada Pinkett-Smith, Cameron Diaz, Bradley Cooper, Anne Hathaway and Hugh Jackman, among many others.
Likely Guests: See VIP cred above.
Fun Fact: Leave the tuxes and gowns at home. The invite reads, "Casual Attire."
The Governors Ball
It's the Academy's official afterparty.
VIP Cred: The Wolfgang Puck-catered affair is just steps away from the show. Every winner--with their Oscar in hand--makes an appearance.
Likely Guests: Winners, nominees and freshman host Seth MacFarlane.
Fun Fact: Last year's surprise entertainer was Tony Bennett.
Sir Elton John and David Furnish
The viewing and after party gala in West Hollywood Park benefits the Elton John AIDS Foundation.
VIP Cred: Tickets cost about $3,000, this year's menu is by Gordon Ramsey and the live auction usually includes the chance to attend the Vanity Fair party with Sir Elton.
Likely Guests: Eva Longoria, Heidi Klum, Chase Crawford, Miley Cyrus, Neil Patrick Harris and Kate Beckinsale.
Fun Fact: The "Rocket Man" singer and his husband had a separate area at last year's bash where their closest friends could visit with their then 14-month-old son Zachary.
The magazine's legendary party has been going for 20 years.
VIP Cred: A strict door policy at the Sunset Tower Hotel keeps crashers out. Arrivals are staggered with VF giving out precise times for guests to arrive--and don't even think of showing up a minute sooner.
Likely Guests: Oprah, Madonna, Elton John, Seth MacFarlane, Natalie Portman, Sandra Bullock, Tom Ford, Vera Wang and Sean "Diddy" Combs.
Fun Fact: The stories from inside this party are endless, but two years ago, Selena Gomez and Justin Bieber chose the VF bash to officially confirm they're a couple by...walking the carpet together!
Madonna & Guy Oseary
Taking place at Oseary's home, it's a late-night after afterparty.
VIP Cred: No matter how famous you are, you have to get special permission to bring more than your plus-one.
Likely Guests: Leonardo DiCaprio, Kate Hudson, Orlando Bloom and Ellen DeGeneres.
Fun Fact: Madonna was spotted dirty dancing with Lindsay Lohan the same year the Queen of Pop showed off--and kissed!--her then 22-year-old Brazilian boy toy Jesus Luz.