Huckabee Weight Gain May Be a Calculated Move

Only thing more thrilling than a weight-loss triumph is two weight-loss triumphs

By SARA K. SMITH
Updated 10:35 PM PDT, Wed, Jul 15, 2009

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He's up, he's down ... he's the Republicans' "comeback kid," waging battle with his waistline.
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Could Mike Huckabee be any more obvious about his plans to "take back the White House" in 2012?

The affable Southern socialist is famous for running Arkansas for a while and also turning out a whole bunch of diet books about how everybody needs to put down their turkey drumsticks and quit being slobs. He even followed his own advice, losing wheelbarrowfuls of weight by eating better and exercising. He was a sterling example to the nation! He was a self-made man, a by-the-bootstraps reformer who remade his own body thereby proving that he could remake America and indeed the world.

Then he lost the Republican presidential nomination to John McCain, who has never struggled a day in his life with his weight and therefore knows nothing of human suffering.

Anyhow, the rigors of civilian life and hosting some weekend talk show on Fox News have clearly taken a toll on the formerly svelte Governor Huckabee, who recently admitted he's losing his battle with weight again:

While in office he began a running and diet regimen that enabled him to lose his extra weight.

He said keeping the weight off has been a struggle recently.

“It’s been hard the last several months because of the crazy schedule and I have had some issues with (feet),” Huckabee said. “It’s a constant struggle to find decent things to eat on the road and not get terribly messed up with the same old habits.”

Hmm, very suspicious! You couldn't write a better plot if you were scripting a Rocky sequel. Here's how it goes: Tubby gov decides he's finally going to start treating himself right and sheds loads of weight. He shares his triumphant story with the nation. But fate has other plans for him! He gains the weight right back ... only to LOSE IT AGAIN, in a brilliant comeback that nobody thought possible!

In America, the only thing more heroic than losing weight is losing weight twice. And that is why Mike Huckabee will be our next president.

Dietician Sara K. Smith writes for NBC and Wonkette.

First Published: Jul 15, 2009 11:22 AM PDT

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