A very special delivery: L. Condoms is getting a certain small box to customers' doors this Valentine's Day. Want more? Add on flowers and wine.
Personal products. After hours. Private affairs. Romantic times. Touch and Go.
To be the brave person tasked with naming the pharmacy aisles where the condoms might be found must be a wondrous calling indeed. Euphemism is key, and while the sign writer likely longs to be a little cheeky -- maybe slipping a more common condom term onto the sign -- the language has to be straightforward and plain, with absolutely zero winking.
L. Condoms agrees. The company's outlook is that "condom aisles are the worst" and that discreet, to-your-door delivery is the path to a happy and friskier future. With that in mind, the California company has launched a lickety-split service that gets a box of condoms to you, at your address, in under 60 minutes.
Well, if you live in Los Angeles or San Francisco, that is. The products arrive "in an unlabeled black box" that's wheeled to your place by "hip bike messenger." The site you need to know is thisisL.com, and if you live beyond the Calimegalopolises mentioned, take heart: The company is expanding the saucy-minded service to more cities later this year.
The flat fee for this? Five bucks. The launch date? Why Feb. 14, 2014.
But if you want to go bigger -- ahem? -- on Valentine's Day, they'll "bundle locally grown flowers and sustainably made wine" with your unlabeled black box. We can only describe this homina-inducing holiday package as hot-under-the-collar-y to the nth degree.
The company also has a drugstore presence, at CVS, if you are particularly charmed by the signs over the aisles. Who wouldn't be? And how does one get a job writing those?
For more info on the under-an-hour Valentine's bundles, complete with that unlabeled black box, read on, romantics.