Bacon: The Los Angeles Tour

The salty strip is the biggest celebrity of all on this metro roll.

Which is a more powerful source of pure enigmatic energy in this universe: Beetlejuice or bacon?

We ask this only because there's this peculiar phenomenon that holds a lot of water: Say "Beetlejuice" three times and summon a certain mirthful ghost. Likewise, merely picture bacon, smell it, or think of the word, and suddenly there's a new salty sizzling bacon-themed event before you.

For sure, bacon happenings dot the modern calendar like so many Bac-O Bits speckling a salad -- Bacon & Barrels lands in San Diego at the end of May -- but the chance to hop on a tempting tour of secret savory spots, spots that know their way around a rasher, is something rather different.

Laist says The Secret City-helmed four-hour tour -- uh, may we pause here to type "four hours!!!" with multiple exclamation points? -- thank you -- heads out on Saturday, May 17.

Four hours. Of bacon. Meat mavens, your day has come, and it is the third Saturday of May.

"From savory to sweet, we'll hit the streets and find out just how versatile bacon has become," says the ticket site. Cost for spending a sixth of an entire day pursuing the bacon arts? Sixty dollars.

Count on the bacon treats you try to go way beyond how they're presented in our morning meals, and if there are a few sweet treats along the way, involving a certain curly-edged strip, don't be all aflutter. Bacon is showing up in everything from malts to cookies to the ubiquitous doughnut.

And don't be surprised if you're noshing on something off-menu. Please, foodies love going off-menu, and if bacon is involved? It's a gourmand happening of sizzling proportions.

Two things: 1) You may not think you can devote four hours to snacking upon bacon, but, let's be straight here: You probably can, and will, if given the chance. And 2? It's only a matter of time before another bacon-themed reference pops up in your day. Like Beetlejuice, this particular meatstuff is positively supernatural, and does have a way of showing up in strange places merely when we think about it.

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