air travel

Mom defends dad who sat apart from their family on a plane

While some people are accusing a father of weaponized incompetence, his wife says they are just doing what works for their family.

@mariaroberts via Instagram / Maria Roberts

A New Jersey mom is defending her husband, who enjoyed in-flight entertainment while she entertained their two kids. 

In a now-viral Instagram video, Maria Roberts, 37, is shown sandwiched between her 5-year-old son, Luca, and 3-year-old daughter, Kaia. Maria’s husband Lou, is seated directly across from his family. While Maria fetches snacks, untangles cords, and pulls toys from the carry-on bags that she packed, Lou takes the opportunity to zone out with headphones.

“As Lou likes to say, ‘I would switch with you, but they refuse to sit next to me,’” Maria captioned her clip, which has been seen nearly 15 million times.

“I never expected the comments to be so angry,” Maria, a speech pathologist, tells TODAY.com. 

“I hate that this is still a standard we are promoting. Even young children can learn that that Dad is a good option and don’t need to always be with mom. Please for the love of God stop reinforcing that dads are incapable,” one person wrote.

Added another, “You deserve better!! We each take one kid and they go in the window seat, younger one in the row behind so their feet only kick their brother. Husband manages one kid’s entertainment and snacks, and I do the same.”

That wouldn't work for the Roberts family.

"The kid that isn't with me would be crawling over the rows to get to me and that would cause a scene," Maria says. "We're just doing what makes our lives easier and this is what works for us."

She notes that if she and Lou switched seats, Luca and Kaia would simply relocate to her lap.

“I like making moms laugh and letting them know, ‘You’re not alone in this,’” she explains. “As far as the negativity goes, I’m not offended and neither is Lou. Just because he sits in the fourth seat on an airplane doesn’t mean he’s not an amazing dad.” 

As for the headphones that some commenters called "triggering," Maria says they were turned down. She doesn't understand what the big deal is.

“The second I flag him, he takes them off," she says. “I don’t expect him to stare at us the entire flight."

Maria says that she and Lou “divide and conquer” in different ways. For instance, he makes all restaurant reservations on vacation, and pulls the car around when it’s raining. He also pushes the double stroller and does all the "heavy lifting."

“Everyone has their opinion and they’re entitled to their opinion.. But I know I have a great husband,” she says. “We have equal parts, they’re just different.” 

This article first appeared on TODAY.com. More from TODAY:

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