Welcome to the 21st Century: coming out of the closet on Facebook.
Yes, millions of gays and lesbians are using social media to reveal their sexuality to friends, family, and co-workers, just by a click of a box.
With more than 500 million users, Facebook is by far the most popular social media site. There has been no official study on the impact of Facebook is having on the coming out process, but for many people, including my Facebook friends, answering the profile question, "Are you interested in men or women" has been unexpectedly liberating.
"Yes, I have used Facebook to out myself as well to both family and friends. I don't think I did it purposely; however I’m not one to hide my relationship with my boyfriend or friends," said Andre Brooks, a television news producer in Washington D.C.
"When I've started a new job, it has made it easier just to ask if they are on Facebook. If so, then they find out for themselves and I don't have to announce that I'm gay," said Michael Leonard, a health care professional in Los Angeles.
But experts warn, for many people, there are a lot of self-esteem and fear issues that don't get addressed by simply clicking a box and letting the chips fall.
"I think it's awesome and for some people that's enough, but for others, it may not be the best way,” said Ruben Romo, Manager for Learning Curve and Social Networking Programs at Los Angeles Gay & Lesbian Center.
In Romo's seven years of experience leading groups of people who are struggling with their sexuality, he said more and more people, by simply updating their Facebook status, are finding that they are missing out on the human connection of looking people in the face to say, "This is who I am."
He adds, "I think it’s a tool in the process. But often family who find out via Facebook have their feelings hurt and doing it on-line creates wounds that need to be healed."
But for my friends like Michael Leonard, it has been the perfect way to deal with the issue of his sexuality.
"For childhood friends who I have reconnected with on Facebook, I don’t have to tell them and so far that has made it easier, plus they get to see my partner and figure out I’m a normal human being and not a stereotype you see during gay pride parades or a protest."
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