Hmmm, where was it I saw just recently a discussion on men in sports, and short shorts? OH I KNOW, it was HERE, in this very space. And I'm happy to report, one of my very loyal readers (a male, and a sports guy, even) sent me a hot tip late yesterday afternoon that he saw it on CNBC, that yes, in fact, SHORT SHORTS are making a comeback, and it's all thanks to an athlete!
See, we were bemoaning the fact (well, I was) that the inseams are getting longer and longer, and fondly remembering the days when NBA players ran around in what amounted to hot pants, not half-pants. Check out the slideshow to the left; click on the picture of John Stockton "the last NBA player to wear shorts, not bloomers," according to the great John Wooden.
The story goes, that way back when, Michael Jordan asked for longer shorts, so he could wear his North Carolina shorts underneath, and also have something to wipe his hands on...and because he was a superstar and everyone wanted to Be Like Mike, the official NBA shorts became, well, way less short. Superstar athletes, in my estimation, dictate men's fashion on and off the court or playing field, in the same way female pop icons dictate what women end up wearing. And men's fashion cycles go on forever, with glacial change, if any.
Well, here's to global warming, then. How's this for timing. Am I on the cutting edge or what? Am I the only one who just reached critical mass on the whole men-in-bloomers thing? Apparently pretty great, and yes, and no, in that order.
Enter Cristiano Ronaldo. I have never heard of Ronaldo, or watched Soccer except for when I used to cover the World Cup, but I may have to start. Apparently this picture of him in Las Vegas, California (yes, that's sort of how they described where he was in the U.K. publications) is one of a series of photos of the soccer star in teeny shorts that is the start of a revolution. Here are the headlines:
Cristiano Rolando Short Shorts Set Mens Fashion Stores into Short-Shorts Frenzy, 2009 year of the Camp Male Fashionista?
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Cristiano Ronaldo and the short-shorts uber camp fashion craze, changing the way men see their fashion boundaries.
The story that follows is quite revealing ... and unbelievable. And, I point out, European. The same Europe where men (who aren't competitive swimmers) still wear Speedos. With that qualification in mind, read on:
Not seen since the male fashionistas of the 1980's or on an Australian rules Football field, the super tight and super short, short, shorts fashion for men have been made fashion famous world wide by footballing superstar Cristiano Rolando and his uber camp fashionista ware.
New Barcelona FC player, Cristiano Ronaldo was snapped in super tight white short shorts in the last few weeks, on holidays in California, and now fashion outlets tell news orgs that sales in the must have fashion short shorts range are sky high. Reuters said that department store group Debenhams told them that sales of skimpy shorts have bounded some 117 percent in the last week alone.
Its all thanks to footballing supersater Ronaldo, the men's fashion store spokes people say. "His sense of style has moved men's shorts into an entirely new ball game," said the director of Debenhams' menswear department.
"We believe that demand for super tight shorts is about to become a worldwide phenomenon -- and the value of the market will dwarf the fee paid for the player by Real Madrid."
Really? Wow. There's just one thing I want to point out. Like miniskirts or midriff-baring tees or low slung pants on ladies, not all men should be wearing these micro shorts. And let's not forget about this ill-advised attempt at a fashion craze a few years back: the men's shortpants suit. Did anyone ever really wear these?
I would write more but I can't see the screen through the tears in my eyes. Baahahah! I needed a good laugh.
Have a great weekend.