Ranch-Dispensing Vending Machines Are Now a Thing

Drizzle it, spoon it, or stow a small dish in the vicinity of your fries or onion rings?

However you approach the enjoyment of ranch dressing is entirely up to you.

But you've likely never procured the creamy condiment, which is known for its mayo-y richness, its lightly spicy kick, and its ability to add dippable delightfulness to every savory side, straight from a vending machine.

That could change on Wednesday, March 10, which every Ranchie knows is National Ranch Day. (Not sure, honestly, if ranch fans are called "Ranchies" or something else, but surely committed condiment cravers need their own dedicated nickname.)

To celebrate the ranch-drizzled occasion?

Jack in the Box is placing a trio of CRAVE vending machines around Los Angeles, which, yes, will dispense ranch dressing, as well as "fun-filled prizes."

The fast food giant vows that "ranch lovers can get AS MUCH ranch as they want" at the ranch-packed machines, which may-probably-likely be found in Santa Monica, Grand Central Market in DTLA, and at Hollywood & Highland.

That's what the ranch-scented hotline, which is the tastiest hotline to be hooked into, is saying as National Ranch Day dawns.

As you make for one of the three CRAVE vending machines on March 10, consider this: Do we order a side of ranch with our favorite fries or sides or do we order those munchies to actually accompany the ranch dressing we're longing for?

It feels like an eternal infinity loop, the fry-ranch relationship, and its many mysteries won't soon be solved or untangled, even by the age's greatest thinkers.

So the immediate solution? Simply savor your go-to condiment, whenever you like, and, if possible, whenever March 10 returns. Happy Ranch Day, Ranchies!