On Sale: Pageant of the Masters 2016

Next summer is months away, but seats for the stand-still spectacle are available now.

Much is made of our general stationary natures come Thanksgiving, when jokes about naps on the couch and naps on the den floor and naps with one's head on the dining room table find a lot of play.

This brand of seasonal wisecracking is not incorrect, but blaming the tryptophan in the turkey will only take you so far. Truth is, staying a little still, and quiet, and in place, for an hour or two, just feels good on the holiday, especially given the rush we feel as we prepare for the big feast.

The most don't-move-me day of the year, then, is just the right lead-in for what always follows a few days later: The Nov. 30 announcement that tickets for Pageant of the Masters are on sale.

This is indeed the same spectacle that's been charming Laguna Beach for over 80 years. You're correct when you say this is the stage show where live human beings stand seemingly anchored in place, inside re-created paintings, and waiting for the performers to move, or even blink, becomes something of a passionate pursuit among keen-eyed audience members.

And you're right on the money when pause and say "what a minute... isn't this a summer thing?"

It so is. And so popular is the venerable pageant, with great swaths of seats selling out months in advance, that "advance" is the key word: Tickets regularly go on sale more than a half year ahead of opening night. 

Which is Thursday, July 7, 2016. As is tradition, the pageant will run -- er, stand still -- right through to the end of August.

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Two fun things? The 2016 theme is "Partners," those "compelling collaborations" that have given art, and its subject matter, much of its vim and verve over the centuries.

And the second tidbit? Tryouts for the pose-in-a-painting roles always fall around the holidays, so if this is a bucket-list-y type dream for you, don't dally; you'll need to start practicing your non-blink poses as soon as possible.

But then you might have already started practicing over Thanksgiving, right? When you stayed pretty stationary, on the couch, for several hours?

Maybe you possess the knack, that stay-motionless talent that's been displayed by hundred upon hundreds of Californians over the decades. Californians, we'll add, that all left the famous Laguna Beach production with some very unique tales to tell, about that one summer they stood inside a real-life painting.

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